posted by Matt W on August 3rd, 2011

Every time my wife goes out of town for business she is stressed. First, she always tries to clean off her to do list completely, including all the items that haven’t really mattered for the last 4 weeks. Because of all her last minute tasks, she always leaves packing to the very last minute, typically waking up at 4:30 to hurriedly pull together her suitcase (or more precisely waking me up to pack “with” her). Without fail I am going to hear the phrase “I don’t have anything professional to wear” (insert casual if vacationing, dressy if going to a wedding, etc. but mostly professional). My typical response is why don’t you try this, and when you get home we can go shopping and look for something professional (I have learned a few things over the course of my marriage). I say this oft-repeated phrase knowing full well that the next time she goes shopping she is going to buy jeans, cute shoes, and blouses and not find anything professional. But in order  to get her out the door, I play our age old game.

Well my wife  went out of town about a month ago and the whole “professional attire” scenario played out to perfection with the typical “I don’t have a single professional outfit in my closet”, followed by the “when you get back in town we’ll have to go shopping”. She found a few “passable”  outfits and wished she could “just wear jeans and cute shoes instead.”

Were this story gets interesting is that this time while my wife is out of town, my daughter has to “wear a professional outfit” for 8th grade professional day. Her amusing “Just show me all the “professional” outfits in Mom’s closet and then I will know what to look for” turned to downright scary when she looked at a few outfits and said “I think I just don’t like professional stuff. Why can’t I just dress in nice jeans, and a cute blouse and be good?” She even said it with the exact tone my wife uses. When I am babbling in the insane asylum like Salieri, “professional outfits” will be one of the topics of conversation with my priest. Really, this is the genetic trait that got passed on to my daughter, thanks honey. As I still have some fashion pull with my teenage daughter, at least for a few weeks, as the “My Cool Dad” phase turns into “My Old Man,” I was able to get out of the store in less than 20 minutes with a fairly professional looking pair of slacks. As my “dad” powers start to fail I can feel myself take one step towards the loony bin. It feels like I’m almost  there; does anyone know a good priest?

File Under King of the Castle, Mr. Cool