posted by Matt W on September 24th, 2014

I walked into a restroom the other day and moseyed on up to the urinal. It was abnormally high. I mean really high to the point that most people would be aiming up. While I wasn’t on my tippy toes or anything like that, my first thought was, “it was a good thing I’m over 6’ tall.” I made a mental note to frequent the establishment. I actually thought they should put up a sign stating that men over 6 feet are not only welcome but catered to.

The 6 foot tall club. 6’ tall is a pretty important barrier in judging men, and yet it’s so arbitrary. I mean do they have a 1.8288 meter club in countries that use the metric system? Not that I’m aware of. And yet here in the U.S. with our antiquated measuring system, being 6’ is kind of a big deal. And as I am over 6’, I am happy to enforce the membership rules.

I’m 6’ 1 ½”. Sometimes I say I’m 6’ 1” and sometimes I go with 6’ 2” just because after your 6’ tall no one really cares. Guys that are in the 5’11” range all say they are 6” tall. Sorry, but no. Some that are even shorter say they are part of the 6’ tall club. Really sorry, and as your already slightly delusional, check out Lilliput on your next vacation, you’ll love it. 6 feet tall is 6 feet tall.

Now I will say that as a tall person, I enjoy the many advantages that come with height. I get to stand in the back and basically hide during every group photo that is taken. Someone said I make more money because I’m tall (apparently I’m the one pulling down that average). I also have long arms and big hands (I can palm a basketball, isn’t that right Joe) and as such I can reach every cupboard in the house, and change light bulbs in most rooms without a step stool. I’m tall. It also means that I don’t fit in an airline seat anymore, all things that are hung on walls are way too low, and I hit the top of my head on things a lot. If you have ever thought these things in your life, you are probably part of the club. If not, well, you need not apply, because you not tall enough.

Now someone brought up an interesting thought on the golf course the other day. What if you were 6’ tall but due to the gravitational pull on the human body over time you are no longer there? For example my father was well over 6’ tall for most of my life but now really isn’t even close.  Speaking on behalf of all 6 footers I would say once you made it, you’re in for life (and check out one of those inversion tables).

So if your 5’ 11 and 99/100”, nope, not quite.

6’ and 0/100”, you’re in for life.

It’s a measurement and you know who you are.

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