posted by Matt W on September 19th, 2012

I have the best dog in the world. I am not trying to offend anyone and their incredibly nice “if I can’t have Matt W.’s border collie” dog, but my dog is amazing. Everyone that comes in contact with my dog thinks so. It is because he is so wonderful that we give him nice treats on his birthday and Christmas, and random people in his life bring by toys and treats all the time. One of my daughter’s friends brought him a plastic chew toy. He played with it with her until she left. He didn’t give this toy the time of day, until she came over a week later. And when he heard her at the door, he ran and got the chew toy to play with her. He never plays with this toy, but like clock-work when she comes over, he gets it and drops it at her feet. God, I have a smart dog.

Anyway, the other day we were sitting at the table playing cards and my dog wandered over and sat at my feet. In a break in the action, I went over to the snack-bag in the pantry and sifted through the many different packages of treats. Some were open and some new and I grabbed an unopened bag of treats that looked like mini steaks. I opened up the package, took a couple out and resealed the bag and put it back. I gave one of the treats to my dog, and then made him give me a fist bump for the other one (Great trick to teach your dog, everyone thinks it’s so cool that they buy him even more snacks). He seemed to really like them. About an hour later during another break in the card game, I went and got him another one, which he hardily devoured.

The next morning, I amble downstairs and noticed that my dog wasn’t looking me in the eye. This usually means that my children are doing something wrong (he truly is man’s best friend), but as it was 5:30 in the morning and they were asleep, I knew that it was the dog that had been up to something. I walked to his bed and I found laying there the empty, opened package of mini-steak snacks from the previous day. No wonder he looked guilty. “Sundance!” So I storm into the kitchen to see the entire container of dog snacks pulled over and individual snack packages lying all around it.

It was then that it got really interesting.

As I mentioned some are open and some new, but all of them were undisturbed. He had only been looking for the steaks snacks from the previous night as he sifted through the treats bag. Now, we have had this bag of snacks on the floor of our pantry for years. As I have children, there is a better than average chance the door is left open and truth be told if they didn’t leave it open, I probably did. My dog has had hundreds if not thousands of opportunities to get into his treat bag.

These must have been some pretty damn good dog treats!

So being the good dog owner that I am (I never get mad at my dog for being too smart), I went over and told my dog how amazing he was and while I didn’t have any of the “good stuff” with which to reward him, I did accidentally drop a bit of Tillamook cheese on the floor and I don’t remember actually eating cheese that morning.  I also put the mini-steak treats on the grocery list.

Border Collies people, you can’t go wrong.

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