posted by Matt W on March 28th, 2012

I don’t have my head completely buried in the sand. I have used the internet since Al Gore invented it, and am usually very proficient at finding just about anything. I use my computer for a variety of tasks that would probably be more difficult without it, probably. I use e-mail, but am frustrated that no one answers their phone anymore to talk to you because they know you will eventually e-mail them if they ignore you long enough. I even write a blog using the power of the internet (although truth be told, I’d rather Xerox a newsletter). I had come to terms with computers, they have their place, but the jury is still out as to whether my life is actually better with them. Until recently.

The other day, I spent hours looking for volleyball statistics tracking software. None of the sites gave any helpful information for deciding which software would be best for my needs. I would have given up and not purchased the app (my usual course of action these days on the internet), but my wife and I are responsible for my daughter’s team stats so I kept looking. I finally decided on a piece of software and dropped $19.99 because it seemed like it could do everything I was looking for. After a frustrating learning curve (there wasn’t a manual), it seemed like a pretty good choice and we took it to a tournament. We collected all the stats over the weekend, and were ready to print out the stats for the coaches to review. It was then that I found out that printing was going to be a problem. After getting me to drop the $19.99, embedded deep in the app, it directs you to another app, also $19.99 that helps in printing out the stats in a usable format (although I will admit an online manual was included with the second app). Everybody assumes that dropping $2.99 here, $19.99 there, and so on is just a payment for being a part of the electronic community these days. In the old days that was called stealing.

Apparently, Big Brother strung us along for free for years and like a drug dealer, now that we’re hooked, wants to be paid back. The worst part is that I’m not even the one who is addicted; I am just impacted by all the other addicts that are willing to put up with this crap to get there internet high.

Not only do they want your money, but they also want your time. In order to find anything these days, I need to spend hours on the computer tracking down all the bits and pieces to get the right information or the best deal. They want your life story before they release any information: your financial information, another $2.99 a month, your e-mail address, your Facebook page, and your mother’s maiden name. I recently spent 2 days tracking down airline flights to hang out with my son. Numerous times I almost called him and said, “I love you but it’s not worth it, I’ll see you when your Mom books you a flight home.”

What I really need is a job so I can be like everyone else and get paid while surfing the internet, maybe then it’s not so frustrating.

The jury has returned to the courtroom. The verdict is in. The Internet Sucks!

File Under Mr. Cool